The Mix Up
by the-twig-rules
Summary: The transporter malfunctions. Leaving the members of a landing party with a bit off a, well, mix up on their hands.
1. Chapter 1

(A/N I own nothing. Star Trek is from the brilliant mind of Gene Roddenberry. Please review and tell me what you think. First time posting and I'm nerves.)

The Mix Up

Chapter One

Mr. Montgomery Scott was called up to the Transporter room. He came running into the room and was shocked. When he was called up the Latinate had made it seem as if there was something wrong. Scotty was about to learn that things had gone very wrong. Moments ago a landing party, consisting of Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and a girl from Engineering had been beamed up. The Transporter was working normally then, halfway through the beam up, the red light began to flash. The images of the party vaguely appeared for a matter of seconds then disappeared, then the light went back to its original state and the landing party was standing on the transporter platform.

Spock looked down, only to be met with the most unpleasant sight he has ever seen. He was not himself, but none other than Dr. McCoy. Spock rose the right eyebrow of McCoy's body. "Fascinating..." He muttered to himself.

"What in the blazes is going on!?" The voice rang through the ears of the first officer, the voice was not only highly emotional, but his own.

"Yes. I would like to know the same thing." The Engineering girl that accompanied them, spoke. She seemed to be staring at her body. Paying quite a bit attention to her breast.

"I would appreciate it if you did not look at my body in that matter. I do not like it when I am, well, myself, and I sure as hell don't like it when I'm watching it be done." Everyone stared as the owner of the highly annoyed voice spoke. The voice was coming out of Captain Kirk's body, but it was not Kirk.

"It would seem that the only logical explanation would be that the Transporter, switched us, when it briefly malfunctioned."

"You mean I have to walk around with pointed ears, green blood, and a heart where my lung should be? Great. Just wonderful!" The argument was one of the strangest sights Kirk, Scotty or anyone else had ever witness. The highly emotional doctor, was calm and being rational. While the unemotional Science officer was not thinking with his head, and was now pacing.

"You're going to have to act like him too." Everyone turned and stared the girl which was now their captain. "We cannot allow any other crew member know what has happened. So until we can figure out how to fix it, we have to act like the person whose body we are in." By the time Kirk had finished speaking everyone, besides Spock, who had beamed aboard, was staring at the captain like he had two heads.

"You have got to be kidding me. Jim, there is no way I can pretend to be that green blooded hobgoblin. I'm a doctor not an actor."

"And there is no way I can be you Captain. I have no idea how to run the people of a ship, only the mechanics of it. Not to mention the fact that I verily ever even leave Engineer. I hardly know any one aboard. I know Mr. Scott, Dr. McCoy, Mr. Spock, and yourself. If we were to have a crisis with me in charge, well. Sir. I do not believe I would be able to handle it." Her voice, well Kirk's voice, was full of worry. "Okay, well, one of us will always be on the bridge. Tell you how to do everything, and who everyone's name is." The girl then turned and headed for the door. "Oh. What's your name?"

"Latinate Margret sir." Kirk nodded then left the room.

"What is it you would like for me to do, captain?" McCoy asked, raising his now pointed eye brow.

"What does Mr. Spock normally do since you can't go to sick bay?" She said looking up at the two.

"Well nothing besides stand beside the captain and say how illogical things are." McCoy smirked and got a glare from the real Spock.

"I do many things doctor. I scan planets, I observe, and I try to remind the captain how much trouble we get into when we listen to you." Anyone paying close enough attention could have caught what looked to be a slight smirk on the man's face.

McCoy gritted his teeth together, grumbled, and stomped out, the other two soon to follow.

"That was very strange." Said the ensine who transported them aboard.

"Aye it was lad. I just hope the captain don' ruin me engine room." Mr. Scott said as he began to work on the transporter.


	2. Chapter 2

(A/N I own nothing. Star Trek is from the brilliant mind of Gene Roddenberry. Please review and tell me what you think. First time posting and I'm nerves.)

Chapter 2

A week. They have been stuck in another's body for a week. All of them were having trouble. Some with the job its self, others with acting like the other person, and all some with both.

Spock has trouble pretending to be McCoy. He had hid his human side for so long that he did not really know has to let it show. At least not to the extreme that the doctor did. Though in Spock's opinion, his lack of emotion has made him able to do McCoy's job better than McCoy does.

McCoy simply could not hide his emotions. He almost had an outburst or two and gained a very strange looks from the crew members on bridge at the time. Lenard actually thought Mr. Chekov had almost pieced the puzzle together a time or two.

Kirk had enjoyed being in a women's body, for about the first two days. Then the body started its period, through the cramps, headaches, and mood swings, he decided he was never going to doubt a girl again about their "time of the month". And on top of all of this he had almost no clue what he was doing in Engineering. Yes he knew what each thing did, but you hand him a tool and tell him to fix it, and he's somehow make things worse. It finally got to the point when Scotty just told him to sit, stay, and watch the transporter.

Latinate Margret was having a time in the captain's chair. It's only been a week and she has already called Uhura by Sulu's name at least twice, thank god she was preoccupied and did not hear her. She has also almost slipped up and called McCoy by his actual name and not Spock about a thousand times. She, at the moment, was not having much trouble with the captain job, it was all simple orders and making sure everything was running smoothly, which she could easily do. It's having to deal with major situations that got to her. Margret already has a reclusive personality and does not like conflict, you add pressure to that and you might as well tell a caterpillar to run the ship.


	3. Chapter 3

(A/N Thank you for your reviews :D it means a lot. I'm glad that you're liking it. I apologize for the chapters being short and for me taking so long to update. We're moving into our house and I've been busy.)

Chapter 3

Pavel Chekov navigation chair right next to Hikaru Sulu. They were having a conversation about how strange Mr. Spock, Dr. McCoy, and their Captain have been acting lately.

"Earlier, I was down in Sick Bay getting my required Physical," Chekov rolled his eyes, "And I asked Dr. McCoy if I could skip. It was a joke of course. But he looked at me and said that it was illogical to skip and started stating regulations."

"Well I saw Mr. Spock drinking some Romulan Ale...last I checked Vulcans don't drink." Sulu said looking up from plotting the Enterprise's course.

"They have all been acting strange. It's almost as if, Spock is acting like McCoy, and the Captain just isn't acting like himself at all. I wonder if something happened while they were on that planet..." Chekov wondered aloud.

* * *

Scotty ran frantically through the halls of the U.S.S Enterprise. He turned a corner so fast that he almost slipped. In all the excitement he almost missed the door he was looking for. He found the room of Latinate Margret and pounded his fist on the door. "CAP-," He had to stop himself, "Margret I figured it out! I have the answer!" Within seconds the door slid open and Mr. Scott was pulled in.

"Well what is it?! I have to get out of this chick body! The boobs hurt my back, I cut myself shaving my legs, there is always a line in the restroom, and damn it I have this strange want to spend three hours just trying to fix my hair!" The girl stared at the chief engineer. Her eyes hopeful for an answer. Scotty let out a laugh.

"Guess, now that you know what they go through, you'll respect women a bit more. And not flirt with everyone you meet."

"I do...respect...Scotty what's wrong with the transporter?"

"Well...you know how just a few days before, you and the landing party beamed down, we had a Klingon attack?" Mr. Scott looked up at his captain.

"Yeah. I do. What about it?"

"Remember how during one of the hits the Transporter room got hit, but the transporter, even though the outside was damaged, the inside seemed fine?" Scotty looked down almost ashamed with himself.

"Get on with it!" The Captain said losing his patients with the guessing game.

"The inside was all fried to hell. I'm surprised it beamed you at all. I'm sorry captain for not catching it sooner..." By this point Mr. Scott was highly disappointed in himself. He was chief engineer and he had not caught it.

"Didn't you send some newer engineers to work on that since it only seemed to be outer damage?"

"Aye, but that sti-" He was cut off by the captain. He put a hand on his shoulder and looked at him.

"It's not your fault. All that matters is that you get it fixed." A smile was on Margret's face.

"Aye captain. I can have her back as good as new in a week." Montgomery said running to the door.

"Mr. Scott. If you could. Less than a week would be nice." With that Mr. Scott ran out of the room.


	4. Chapter 4

(It's kinda scary when the music that inspires you to write is The Cure...Robert Smith's voice is just so amazing.)

Chapter 4

Kirk, well the girl in Kirk's body, sat in the captain's chair. She stared at the screen. A Klingon vessel had just fired at the Enterprise and disappeared. Kirk was about to begin hyperventilating. He told Sulu to raise the shields, then his brain went dead. He was breathing in short deep breaths, and his head was begins to feel light. Spock had began to worry and asking him if he was alright. The only problem was, Kirk, due to the panic attack, he had trouble answering. He finally muttered out the words "Spock, take the bridge" and ran to find the real captain.

* * *

Margret was standing in the transporter room, feeling bad about not being able to help. The ship was under red alert and standing there was killing "her". But with the position she was in she had to take orders from Scotty. The ship just went on red alert and no one had time to take him off "transporter" duty. In other words, they thing Mr. Scott made up so the captain would not ruin engineering.

* * *

The attack had gone on for ten minutes and there was several personal in Sick Bay. Though the job was easy, the real Spock would have preferred to be on the bridge. Being surrounded by groaning and all this emotion was starting to give him a head ache. He also would never admit it to any one, but he was worried about the bridge and ship, under the control of the real McCoy and real Margret.

(This is so short...god...I'm sorry..)


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Kirk dashed into the transporter room. He was running so fast that the doors almost did not have a chance to open for him. He entered to room and slid across the floor. He looked up, out of breath.

Margret stared at the captain, shock on her face. "What the hell are you doing in here?! You're supposed to be on the Bridge! The Enterprise is on red alert and needs it's captain!"

"Yeah. A captain. Not me. And for the time being Mc- Spock, who ever the hell he is, has the con."

"McCoy in charge of a crisis? Damn..." Margret muttered to herself. "I want you to get back up th-" She was interrupted.

"No. You need to be up there. The pretty lady that we're flying in, needs you. If you don't get up there and do your job, you're going to lose the best damn ship in the fleet, and one hell of a crew. The Enterprise needs you to run her, and I need to be in engineering. I'm sure Mr. Scott needs all the help he can get, and I'm an engineering, not someone with the ability to take charge." Kirk said, staring at Margret. Hoping to get through. Margret nodded.

"You make a point." With that Margret ran out of the room, leaving Kirk standing there alone. He then ran down to engineering, reported to Scotty, he could not help but smile to be home again, then set to work. He got odd looks from the crew, but he did not care. The purr of the engine made him happy.

* * *

On the way to the Bridge, Margret stopped and pulled McCoy out of Sickbay, doing so she gained a bunch of unpleasant words from Nurse Chapel. Most of which she did not hear. She ran down the hall and shoved McCoy into the Turbo Lift, grabbed the handle and said, "Bridge".

"This is illogical. Pulling the doctor way from the injured in the middle of an attack." McCoy spoke.

"I agree. But you aren't the doctor. You're a second in command science officer, who also happens to be a Vulcan who is more human then he would like to admit. The doctor is a southern man, who is always grumbling." Margret said. "I think it's about time we return to those roles. What do you think...Mr. Spock?"

"I believe that is a most logical idea captain." McCoy said, letting the comment about him being human slide.

"Glad to know we're on the same page." Margret said with a smile, stepping off the Turbo Lift and onto the Bridge. "McCoy. You're needed in Sickbay, just be pre-warned, your head nurse is in a bad mood. "

"Will do!" Spock jumped out of the captain's chair with a smile. "Finally. You've got some common sense." Spock said has he ran off the bridge.

Margret walked over and sat down in the captain's chair. Smiling a bit. Well until Sulu turned around and saw her sitting in the chair.

"Ma'am. You can't be sitting there. that is for the captain or the person in charge only." Sulu said.

"I am the captain, we had a malfunction with the transporter last time we went on a landing party and switched bodies."

"This is true." McCoy chimed in. Taking his spot on the right side of where Margret is sitting.

"Believe me or not. But listen to me. I'm the Enterprise's survival."


End file.
